A journey into the world of loneliness – and how to deal with it In our modern societies having a ‘rich social life’ is widely seen and promoted as anContinue reading
Is autonomy a myth? (Spoiler: No it is not.)
Are humans autonomous beings or is autonomy a myth? In the debate on this question, two views are often diametrically opposed: on the one hand there are people who believeContinue reading
Why you should always keep asking ‘why?’
You may have noticed that I refer to myself as a “critical thinker” on the homepage of my website. That is not without reason. In my opinion critical thinking isContinue reading
Luxemburg & Belgische Ardennen
13 – 19 september 2020 Via Dinant naar Luxemburg Op zondag rijden we via Antwerpen, Brussel en Namen naar Dinant. Deze niet al te grote stad in het zuidoosten vanContinue reading
Perfection is an illusion. Pursuing it is a recipe for unhappiness
There are many ways in which people can make life hard on themselves. One of the best ways to do so, is without a doubt the pursuit of perfection. PerfectionismContinue reading
IJsland
25 juni – 5 juli 2020 Best vreemd om op reis te gaan terwijl de wereld kampt met een pandemie en Nederland nog maar net begint te ontwaken na drieContinue reading
Individuality, conformity and our need for social acceptance
One of the most paradoxical aspects of human behavior, if you ask me, is the universally felt need for freedom to be yourself and the simultaneous tendency to conform toContinue reading
Hope is not enough
Where there is life is hope, they say. But where there is life, there is also hopelessness. And despair. And cynicism. And wishful thinking, that meaningless hope that will neverContinue reading
Why we need to be angry sometimes (regardless what the Stoics say)
I don’t know about you, but I can get quite angry sometimes. It doesn’t happen often, but things like injustice, cheating and disrespectful behavior can really piss me off. ItContinue reading
Do you want what you wish?
“You don’t have to learn to want,” said Greek philosopher Seneca. And indeed, we humans seem very good at wanting. We want all kinds of things. And there are thingsContinue reading
Forget being who you are. Life’s about becoming who you want to be
You may recognize this: To friends, family or colleagues you can’t refrain from stressing that you “want to be yourself”, and meanwhile you silently ask yourself, “Who am I actually?”Continue reading
5 misunderstandings about being introverted
If someone asks you whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, do you immediately know the answer? I myself do not identify with either; I always say that IContinue reading
Authenticity: your values, your choice
If you buy an age-old painting for a lot of money, you probably want a certificate that guarantees the authenticity of the painting, so that you can be sure thatContinue reading
Chili
15 februari – 7 maart 2020 Santiago Of het bewust gedaan is, weet ik niet, maar Chili heeft wel wat weg van een chilipeper. Het beslaat een smalle strook land,Continue reading
End of a decade
These days you hear and read a lot about this new year’s being the start of a new decade. And it does feel like that, doesn’t it? We tend toContinue reading
Rollo May on choosing to live
“It is doubtful whether anyone really begins to live, until he has frankly confronted the terrifying fact that he could wipe out his existence but chooses not to. Since oneContinue reading
Nicolas Bommarito on modesty
We tend to think we are the centre of the universe, which is true only in the sense that we are the centre of our own experiences. And what happensContinue reading
Rebecca Solnit on progress
“Every act is an act of faith, because you don’t know what will happen. Nobody can know the full consequences of their actions. You just hope and employ whatever wisdomContinue reading
‘Man’s search for meaning’ in 10 quotes
I just finished reading ‘Man’s search for meaning’ by Viktor Frankl. Here are my 10 favorite quotes from this highly recommended book: 1. Happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue.Continue reading
Karim Benammar on meaning
Yesterday, I went to the Brainwash Festival in Amsterdam, a philosophy event co-hosted by The School of Life Amsterdam. At the festival I attended a lecture by Karim Benammar, whoContinue reading
Maria Popova on critical thinking and hope
“To live with sincerity in our culture of cynicism is a difficult dance, one that comes easily only to the very young and the very old. The rest of usContinue reading
On success
Let others worry about winning, fame and popularity. You, instead, are free to choose your own values and therefore your own standards by which you measure success.
Balance, nuance and moderation
Things are hardly ever black and white. There are always different sides to a story. Upsides and downsides to a proposition. When it comes to ideas and values there areContinue reading
Eleanor Roosevelt on life
“It’s your life, but only if you make it so. The standards by which you live must be your own standards, your own values, your own convictions in regard toContinue reading
On distinguishing feelings from thoughts
How many times do we say or think: I feel powerless I feel guilty I feel disappointed I feel misunderstood I feel jealous I feel resentful I feel inferior ProbablyContinue reading
On regret
You should never regret choices you made which, based on your knowledge, experience and options available, you thought to be the best choice at that point in time. What youContinue reading
Baltische staten
6 – 22 september 2019 Als ik de drie Baltische staten, Estland, Letland en Litouwen, moet samenvatten dan zou ik zeggen: een roerige geschiedenis, prachtige oude steden en rustige natuurgebieden.Continue reading
Tim Fransen on morality
“Morality should not be about truth, but about values. Danger arises as soon as the concept of ‘truth’ is introduced in a domain where it does not belong, namely theContinue reading
Canada – Ontario & Québec
24 mei – 9 juni 2019 Canada is het op één na grootste land ter wereld (na Rusland), maar heeft slechts 35 miljoen inwoners. Ik reis twee weken rond inContinue reading
Fromm’s ‘The Art of Loving’
My favorite quote from Erich Fromm’s book ‘The Art of Loving’ is this one: “There is hardly any activity, any enterprise, which is started with such tremendous hopes and expectations,Continue reading
Optimistic nihilism (Is life worth living?)
Whether we consider our life worth living is indeed the ultimate existential question. And I am in constant doubt about the answer… Existentialism is hard, imho, because we have toContinue reading
Happiness as mental disorder
The DSM – often referred to as “The Bible of Psychiatry” – lists over 300 (!) mental disorders. Remarkably, I learned today, happiness is not one of them. Turns outContinue reading
The Zizek – Peterson debate
It was kind of a thing. A big and well advertised debate between two popular as well as controversial thinkers: Slavoj Zizek and Jordan Peterson. Many people were looking forwardContinue reading
The golden rule
The so-called ‘Golden Rule’ is one of the most well-known ethical standards. It states that you should treat others as you would wish to be treated yourself. I have alwaysContinue reading
Are we like hamsters?
Many of us are working to improve their emotional well-being by addressing past experiences and traumas, either by themselves or guided by a therapist. Let me be clear that IContinue reading
Guy Winch on rejection
At some point in our lives, all of us have to deal with rejection (either romantically or professional or otherwise). Now, I am currently reading a book by psychologist GuyContinue reading
Valencia
6 – 9 maart 2019 Cuidad Vieja Halverwege de oostkust van Spanje, aan de Middellandse Zee, ligt Valencia. Het is de op twee na grootste stad van Spanje en heeftContinue reading
On expectations
Yesterday at The School of Life Festival I attended a mini class on ‘expectations’. You know, those tricky imaginations that we all have about what future events are supposed toContinue reading
Still the echo
“Still the echo, so that you don’t allow an event, however unpleasant or momentous, to claim any more time than it took for it to occur. Because what your foesContinue reading
Existential road trip
Life is an existential road trip. You are free to drive where you want. There are no ultimate reasons for taking one road over another. You may crash, and youContinue reading
On time (and why ‘living in the now’ is b*s*)
“Temporality is evidently an organised structure. The three so-called “elements” of time, past, present, and future, should not be considered as collection of “givens” for us to sum up –Continue reading
On free will
I think the whole free will – determinism discussion is pointless, because it’s about two extremes neither of which represents reality. Free will advocates that claim our will is completeleyContinue reading
Kurzgesagt on loneliness
This video by Kurzgesagt / In a Nutshell explains perfectly what loneliness is and how we can deal with it.
On hypocricy
Are you a hypocrite? I think I am. Some say we all are. So here’s a question: What values do you propagate that you do not (always) live by yourself?Continue reading
Desire management
One of the teachers at The School of Life Amsterdam, Lammert Kamphuis, once explained what he called ‘desire management’. He said, whenever you feel a certain desire, ask yourself 2Continue reading
On suicide
In a recent discussion on how people might deal with suicidal thoughts, somebody stated that life has its ups and downs and that people with suicidal thoughts may not alwaysContinue reading
Colombia
15 januari – 1 februari 2019 Een land met een bewogen verleden “Colombia? Is het daar wel veilig?” Dat was de meest gehoorde reactie toen ik besloot naar Colombia teContinue reading
On failing
When something goes wrong, a lot of people blame themselves. They feel they have failed, they are to blame. Does that sound familiar? In that case I would like toContinue reading